What Do you Perceive?

One morning I made an interesting observation about a moth. The moth had apparently trapped itself inside a container, the more it tried to find a way out, the more the powder detergent inside the container engulfed it. In its attempt to free itself, it kept ramming the container but in vain. The irony however was that all this time the container was wide a jar at the top and if the moth was to look up, it would've been able to locate its freedom. This got me wondering,  if I was to think about it, many of us are like the moth. Our perception has been shifted to the challenges and obstacles we face. This has occurred to such an extent that our dreams, relationships, finances and even our mindset have been engulfed by the negative perception we have developed and now we, like the moth are CONTAINED within the limits and boundaries of our negative and painful experiences. All this while our solution may have arrived but our vision has been impaired by our circumstances. We can however avoid the fate of the moth and choose to realign our mindset, transform how we perceive circumstances in our lives and look up to realise your container is wide open. See that challenge as an opportunity instead, develop a solution based mindset through exposing yourself to books that challenge your thinking, autobiographies of people that have been in the same position as you, and even blogs that encourage and inspire you. Ask for help, from people you know will want to help you and not judge you. Look to GOD for help, He will always be there but he won't intervene unless you ask Him to. Remember, you can only ask for help once you realise you need it, however if  you walk in pride it can turn from a coping mechanism into a prison. As I close I advise that you take these simple steps and many other sound alternatives to change your perception, your solution may have already arrived, you just need to SEE it.

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What Language are you speaking?

I once got a message on Twitter from one of my followers. I had rarely interacted with her as most of her tweets were in Spanish, as a result the message was also in Spanish. The message however peaked my interest and I decided to look up the translation. In fact, I also looked up translations for her other tweets and found them to be quite savvy. All this time I had this brilliant person in my network, but my connection to her was hampered by the language barrier. I could choose to continue being estranged from her or I could choose to be intentional and find a way to connect and interact with her; wisely I choose the latter. In fact, I may get to learn some Spanish along the way. In many instances, we all have that person, be it a loved one, client or colleague we struggle connecting with or if a connection occurs it's at a labored pace. My question to you is, what language are you using to communicate?  As effective communication often leads to a good connection. By language I'm not alluding to dialect, rather the means by which you are choosing to share your message across to others. Effective communication is dependant on your listening and speaking skills. At times we just need to speak less  and listen more. Not just hearing (whereby we perceive sound)  but intentionally choosing to engage with the message we are receiving with an aim of achieving an understanding with the other person. Many of us have this part all figured out, it's the speaking part that is our Achilles heel. How you package your message and relay it to others is crucial and we need to be intentional about this.
Here are some of the Languages we use that hamper effective communication;
1. Language of Ambiguity
This language is characterized by use of vague descriptions that don't communicate what you really expect of the other person. For example; your working with others on a group project and you tell your group members that you want to see teamwork in your group and leave it at that point. What is "teamwork" does it mean they form smaller groups and work within these groups? Does it mean that you are encouraging corporate decision making and conformity to the group at the expense of entrepreneurship in the group? Break it down as to what teamwork is to you and how you expect it to play out in the group. This is clear and helps you avoid the confusing language of Ambiguity.
2. Language of Verbosity
This language is characterized by giving the other person an overload of information, majority of which is not relevant or advantageous to them or the task at hand, this can be quite irritating especially in a formal setup like a business or an office. To avoid this,  be clear, precise and on point as to what you expect, don't dance around what you want to communicate to the other person.
Practise these two points and they will aid you to improve your communication  skills and eventually lead to a connection. So as I close I ask again, what language are you speaking?

Beef up your life.

I recently heard quite an interesting feature on the radio. It was about an innovative company called Impossible Foods. Upon further research, I learnt that the company headed by Patrick Brown; a biochemist and former Stanford School of Medicine professor, looks at animal products at the molecular level, then select protein and nutrients from green seeds and grains to recreate the wonderfully complex experience of meat and dairy products. According to Tech Insider (techinsider.com), their Impossible cheese burger mimics the taste of beef as well as sizzles when you toss it on the grill. Slice it down the middle and it shows pink at the center, it leaves a residue of bloody juices on the plate, but it doesn't include an ounce of real meat. I think this is amazing! In fact, their mission according to their site (impossiblefoods.com) is to give people the enjoyment of food that comes from animals without the health and environmental drawbacks. I think they are a clear example of innovation at its best. They have taken  beef and reinvented the wheel in regards as to how it's created. We can also draw lessons from them, what aspects of our lives can we completely reinvent? What component of your life can we study at the molecular level, what actions can you take to be the proteins and nutrients that make up your life? Look at the alternatives to these actions that can be introduced into your life, to not only improve the quality of life you lead but also produce the same end result. These alternative activities/action should be able to give you the same enjoyment as your current ones without the health and environmental drawbacks to your life. The alternative activity may be sleeping earlier to get more rest and give yourself more energy to tackle the next day, it may be cancelling your credit card and getting a debit card instead for greater financial control, or it may be found in a new friendship, whatever it is only you can discover it! So implement these gradually and you will be surprised at the changes they will make to your life. We have the Impossible Cheese burger let's try to lead an impossible lifestyle.

Baggage Claim

In this festive season many of us are traveling to be with our family or for holiday, for those of us flying, we are accustomed to the baggage claim area of the airport. According to Wikipedia; a baggage claim is an area where arriving passengers claim checked-in baggage after disembarking from an airline flight. For international arrivals, the baggage claim area is typically located in a restricted zone, after immigration control and before clearing customs so that all baggage can be inspected by custom agent's.
As we head into the new year, we need to establish our own baggage claim and customs mechanism. We need to sit down and analyze the things in our lives that can't come into the new year with us.The baggage you may have may be a toxic relationship, it may be a mistake made in the past that condemns you to this day, it may be a disappointment we encountered in the year that really hurt us. We need to check all these at our customs agent and not take it into 2016. Forgive yourself, pick yourself up from the disappointment and start again,  end that toxic association that keeps hurting you. Take into 2016 the luggage you need to prosper, recognize the people who add value to your life and appreciate them,  carry a lesson from the past mistake made rather than guilt, take a new mindset into the new year; a trust that God has the best planned for us. Claim all these at your baggage claim and ensure you don't leave any behind. Throughout the year maintain this practice  and keep checking for what needs to go through customs and what we should add to our lives. Before you set your new year's resolutions, first pass by your baggage claim. Have a prosperous year ahead.

HELP: the four letter word.

Recently I had some work to do around the house, I usually do this by myself and I have even developed a system that enables me to effectively carryout this task. So I woke up early to start my work and as I progressed, my mother came to help me without my asking of her. At first I was reluctant to accept her help, I thought; I have been doing this work regularly, I know how to do it well, she may slow me down. However, I decided to work with her, which proved to be a wise decision. With her assistance, not only did I finish the work within half the time it usually takes me to complete the task, but also upon completion, the quality of work was superior to the one I do alone. If I had worked alone, I would have taken more time and used more energy. In life, we often think it's best to work alone and solely depend on ourselves, even though this may be necessary because of the nature of some projects, many instances give us an opportunity to coordinate with others but we choose not to. As a result we find our schedules hectic and cramped with  an endless list of tasks we are unable to complete. In many instances, we even turn down help thinking we are the only one's who can handle the particular task. Ironically, the final component needed to complete that daunting task may be that friend or colleague you have never considered asking for help. The individual you may think is not qualified to be of assistance may end up surprising you if given the chance. You may also know of someone who was like me, ignorant to the fact that they needed help, and you were unwilling to offer help due to fear of rejection. Next time take the plunge and offer to help, you may be surprised to find that all this while, they were looking for help and like you they also were afraid of asking for fear of rejection. In fact, helping someone else achieve a certain goal may end up enriching your life and in the midst of your activity you may get clarity to a situation that was puzzling you.  Lastly, if your among the people who understand the power of partnership, kudos! Today take some time to appreciate that person(s), who has had a helping hand in your life and guided you to your success. I leave you with an African proverb that says "if you want to go fast, go alone, if you want to go far go with someone" (paraphrased)

I've been thinking about you!

Who/what have you been thinking about lately? Who/what dominates majority of your thoughts, more importantly, what thoughts be they positive or negative do you allow to grow and develop in your mind. When I was a boy, my friends and I used to go hunting for birds to keep as pets. I had not caught one for a while, which bothered me, so one morning, before I joined up with my pals, I woke up determined to catch a bird. I visualized in my mind taking my slingshot and hitting a bird on my first try. In my mind I was so convinced I would succeed that I sealed it with a prayer; nothing was going to stop me. When I met with my pals I told them I was going to get a bird that day, this however was met with a response of cruel laughter as my track record was wanting. This didn't deter me however as in my mind the dominant thought was; I AM GOING TO CATCH A BIRD TODAY. I took my slingshot and aimed for a bird that was perched on top of a tree oblivious to my intentions and bullseye! I hit it with my first shot to the amazement of my friends. This incident shows us that the dominant thoughts that we allow to grow and develop in our minds, determine the outcome of our experiences. You cannot control the ideas that come into your mind, but you can control those you allow to grow and inhabit your mind. You may be on the advent of a business, project, relationship or working on developing new habits to break the bad ones that are messing your life. Be sure that thoughts of failure will arise, in fact in the midst of your excitement, you decide to tell someone close to you about your new adventure and to your surprise they respond with ridicule and laughter. This incident tends to remain etched in your subconscious, and in moments of trial, replay in your mind like a broken record. However, there is always a choice, you can choose to ignore the negative and focus on the positive outcome of your project, you can choose to shift your focus from thoughts of rejection, failure, ridicule and prevent them from growing and developing your mental scope into that which is defeat oriented. Choose to stop highlighting the weaknesses of yourself, family or friends. Instead, let thoughts of growth, success, fulfilment and value an individual adds to your life dominate your mind. In life we experience things in a ratio of 80-20, we tend to get back 80 percent from our, business, project or a person. However we sadly tend to focus on the 20 percent we don't have, this can be toxic as it leads us to forfeit the 80 percent we have and go for the 20 percent we thought we needed only to later regret this. So I ask, what have you been thinking about? How have you been perceiving an individual or an opportunity, have you allowed th 20 percent you think you need to dominate your thoughts and devalue your perception of the 80 percent you already possess. It's not wrong when a negative thought arises in your mind, it's however wrong when you ALLOW it to grow and shape your mindset. Have a thoughtful day.


You can connect with me on Facebook; andrew carlton and Twitter; @drewmboya

Storms 101

In my country, we are currently having the rainy season. This was expected as the weather man had earlier forecast el nino rains. When it rains, it usually goes dark, and heavy fog makes visibility difficult. If your at home, the electricity tends to go off. The rains have been so torrent that in their wake they leave a trail of destruction. The rains may last through an entire night or through large spells of the day, but the storm ALWAYS weathers, and the sun will appear to bring respite. In life, we also face our own storms and unlike the weather, our storms are often unexpected. Suddenly, as in a natural storm, we are covered by a dark mist and the vision we had for our family, business, health and our future becomes impaired. Every move we make at the time feels like a futile exercise of groping in the dark. Just as our home, our comfort zone is usually rocked by the storm we encounter, the person or item we have come to depend on goes off like the electricity and leave us desolate. The storm we face, however, usually has a purpose  behind it. As a house starts leaking during a storm, the storm we face may expose a leak in our relationship, that business venture we thought was foolproof, may crumble. The foundation on which we have built our lives becomes tested. The storm we encounter also reveals to us the positives in our lives, it may just prove to you how strong and United your family is, it may reveal to you that hidden tenacity and persistence you never thought you had or it may bring forth an idea that propels you to greatness (necessity is the mother of invention). The good news is that the storm will ALWAYS come to pass. The sun will shine again, I believe that the light that dawns in the aftermath of a storm is the brightest. So, if your going through a storm, take heart, it will come to pass, don't be overwhelmed by the worsening situation as it's always darkest before the dawn.


You can connect with me on Facebook; andrew carlton and Twitter; @drewmboya